Are you an idiot?

I'm still not used to this new med. Went from insomnia to being able to fall asleep at the drop of a hat. Plus, the treadmill is broken [ssssssssshhhhhhhh,..YAY!YAY! a GREAT excuse!] So I've been spending time at Facebook. Yelling at one relative who stressed Steve right out to the max. Looking at my nieces FB. She is asking ALL idiots to leave her FB right now. When I got done laughing I wondered, how would you know if you were an idiot? I got sidetracked into googling that and had quite a few yuks. Here is one of the returns from that search:

http://www.iamanidiot.com/idiotif/

Saw Boos' FB first thing this morning, she left posts for Steve and me, informing us that the latest Jean Auel book is available for preorder at Amazon. [I think it was more of a "heads up" to Steve, Boo has my back in all things book-related.] From the time I saw Boos post to the time the book was in my cart, less than one literal minute elapsed. I LOVE Amazon. Here' a link if you are a fan:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0517580519/ref=oss_product

And a pic....baby lemons on my lemon tree! [I live in NY, and have never had the correct conditions to make a lemon tree set fruit before, so this very exciting to my green thumb !]

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

Love Love this website:

http://www.brainyquote.com/

Am going thru major withdrawal symptoms from Caffeine today. Would not wish this on anyone.

PSVT for short

Dearest Bloggie,
I am so sorry for neglecting you for so long! I know you were wondering "WHY? Why are you so quiet Gail?"

I always promised myself that, when I was blogging, no matter what I said it would be straight up. Recently I have had something happen to me. A medical problem, that scared the living shit out of me and I was afraid to blog about it. First, I needed to get a diagnosis, and second, I had to make sure that blogging about this wouldn't embarrass my family, they come first. I really believe that we are all on the planet together, and if I can share what happened to me, so some other person isn't so afraid, then that's what I'll do.

Since maybe September '09, I noticed that when I get pissed or stressed, I could "feel" my heartbeat. No pain, or anything else. I was just very aware of it.
One Monday morning in December, I got out of bed. That was ALL I did...and my heart felt like a freshly landed lake trout. It was bouncing around in my chest so badly I thought I was going to die. The dizziness was overwhelming.No pain, no pressure, no shortness of breath. But it eventually passed, and I went to work [I know, stupid stupid stupid.]
Since then I have had a recurring problem with my heartbeat. I can always "feel" my heartbeat, and sometimes it speeds up for no reason. After another "episode" [like the one in December] I finally went to my Doc. She did an EKG on the spot. It showed no heart attack or damage, but a resting pulse rate of 98bpm. This is not good. After doing my annual blood work [and the results were terrific, I would stack my results up against my kids] She told me I needed to have a Holter test. I was given an appointment a week later with a "specialist" in my Docs practice to get a Holter. That would be a small appliance you wear for 24 or 48 hrs that tracks your heartbeat. After 24 hours I went back,...on a tuesday. They removed the Holter, and I was told I'd have results within days. Silly me, seeing as how this is my HEART and an important piece of testing, I believed them. Friday I called the specialists' office and said YO?? They said, oh the specialist will forward the results to your doc. I called my doc the Following tues, and they had no results. I called that FRIDAY and said this is IT, I want the friggin results. It turns out they got "lost" in the specialists office. A nurse from my Docs office had to walk over and make them look for the results. @@
It showed that there were 3 times where my heartbeat went up to 200 bpm. Scary, considering that isn't the worst I've felt, and they sat on the friggin results.
Off to the Cardio my doc recommended.
I am tempted to hook her up with my blog address so she can read how I really felt.
I will NOT sit and wait for a doc for more than 30 minutes. Will not do it. I know they have emergencies, so when I go in I ask what the wait time is. If the wait is large, and If I'm not sick, I'll cancel and reschedule, or see a P.A if the spirit moves me.
When I went into the cardio, I asked if the doc was running on time. The nurse said oh yes, we're normal today, and you are the first appointment [9am]. She whisked me right into an exam room and took my history.
And there I sat for an hour.
I was picking my stuff up to leave, and in waltzes the cardio.
Let me try to paint a picture.
The cardio RUNS into the exam room, wearing a pilled up saggy brown suit. Without sitting down, introducing himself or looking at me he proceeded to look at my chart and ask questions. He was acting like a man who owed a bookie money at the track, never still, twitchy, shifting back and forth on his feet, asking more questions before I could finish answering the ones he had just asked. He had seen it all, I guess, and didn't need to hear from me what my problem was, he had already decided. He looked at the results of the Holter test, and said Yes, when I read this, I saw 3 instances....

[are you digging this? This NUT CASE doc was the once who's office screwed up with the results of the Holter test on me, and I didn't even KNOW it! If I had known he was the one who lost my results, I never would have gone to him in the first place, but I trusted my primary Doc]

Evidently I gave an interesting answer...........because he took a paper hand towel...you know the kind, in dispensers by sinks, a plain white tri-fold paper hand towel.........and starting taking case notes on it. Right then and there, my gut gave my brain a vote of "no Confidence". He ended the appointment very abruptly, with an RX to fill, and an RX for 2 tests he wanted done "at his other location". At that point he walked me back out to the reception desk. I asked if he had a web site so I could look up office hours and directions to the "other location" and he did not know.
I didn't realize, until the nurse said it, that he had never even told me his name. I was not going back there.

I came home, called the office and told the nurse I was going with a cardio closer to home, as their office is 40 minutes away on a good day. I didn't want to go off on her over the buffoon she works for, I didn't think that would be right.

Steve and I asked around for references, and when we got 2 that looked promising, we did our research on them. One, recommended by a friend, was 40 minutes from the house. The other, recommended by 2 people Steve works with, and is 10 minutes from the house. Guess who I picked? I think the surprising thing was how strongly people feel about their doctors. One friend told Steve, in a private note, that it was painful to "See ME being illogical" and I was being *annoying* because I hadn't chosen the Dr she had recommended. THAT was strange to read. As if I weren't in my right mind or something. So, you also learn who to turn to for advice, as well as who NOT to turn to.
And so yesterday, I met my Cardio for the first time. From the moment I walked in, I felt I made the right choice.The intake nurse, the one that gets your stats and such, she was such a far cry from my first experience I almost cried right there. And the Dr...... Yes. THAT is how a Dr. is supposed to treat you.
After the Doc introduced himself, asked what my symptoms were, and asked a few questions as he examined me, he said I need an EKG, but I believe I have a diagnosis for you. I will return when the EKG is complete.

[an aside...I had my first EKG at age 35. I was having terrible chest pains and feeling kinda tired. It turned out I had double walking pneumonia. I went to a walk-in place, and I remember THAT EKG as if it were yesterday A guy, who insisted I needed to be topless, who then proceeded to bring two other docs in "for training purposes" I never returned to that place either.]

So I was not prepared for the ease of this EKG's. Lift your shirt, bada-bing bada-bang, and you are done. My cardio let me see the results and explained them to me too, no "Gweat and Wonder Oz" shit in there]
The doc returns and says, I have a gift for you. The gift of Menopause, plus...after a few more questions...it turns out that I have Paroxysmal Supra Ventricular Tachycardia [PSVT for short] I need two non-invasive tests, which were scheduled for me before I left the office. My treatment consists of a beta-blocker to make my heartbeat behave, and a dietary change. No Caffeine. At ALL, from Any source,no stimulants, and no chocolate, either. [oh...no street drugs either. DAMN!!! There's ALWAYS something.] He said *I* have to manage this, I need to keep myself out of situations that will bring on an episode. I wanted to ask if scrubbing the toilet qualified as one of those situations, but I decided to save that question for my 6 week follow-up. If I can stop laughing long enough, I am SURE I can convince Steve that "socks on floor" invites an episode. I need to think about this, it could be a gold mine!

[another aside,..I had an "episode" watching the movie "Armageddon...you know the scene, where Bruce Willis is telling his daughter he never broke a promise before, but he has to now. It was a HUGE episode. My heart reacts TOTALLY out of sync with my actual emotional state during those times. So how do you know in advance is a movie or book is going to sandbag you? I got an e-mail with the subject line "This video will bring you to tears" and I deleted it unread :X ]

For me, there is an upside, though. The Dr said that my type of PSVT generally goes away when menopause is over. I can go back to treadmilling and working out, I need to take 6 weeks and gradually build back up to where I was before the first cardio told me not to do that until I was diagnosed. This cardio says it helps, and he is dismayed that the first cardio told me that.

Well, I sat there and did every I could do not to cry. My relief was so great. I grew up with mother who spent more time in the hospital than out of it. Anything medical for Steve or the kids, I'm all over it, no prob. If *I* have an issue, I am frightened beyond my ability to blog. Even though time has proven this isn't true,- I am afraid I'll be my Mom all over again.

I am THRILLLED that I trusted my gut. I will be 50 in January. I was brought up to be "nice" or a "good girl" [really, pick your ass up off the floor, your laughter is increasing my heart rate] to do what authority figures said, ...if you are my age or older, you know what I am layin' down. If I had done that, and stuck with racetrack cardio, I would be on the wrong med, at Twice the recommended starter dose, and I would be MISERABLE. So please, if something doesn't feel right, even if you can't articulate to your self or anyone else what it is, just get the hell OUT of there. Because I trusted my gut, my heart will be OK.

I'm glad to be back. It was hard not to blog. I didn't want to make references to "episodes" or things happening to me and not explain them, so I just shut up. Well, now you know :o) And I can get pictures of the baby lemons on my lemons tree, and bitch at you about bastard woodchucks and their spawn from Hell! Ain't life grand?

I'll be back !

I had a hissy hit over the porno responses to my blog entries. It seems that SCADS of us have the same issue.I figured if I didn't blog for a while, I'd be forgotten. Not true, and not the experience of any other Blogger I'm talking to.
My stance on porno:
To each his own. Do not force your foshizzle on me, and I won't force mine on you. I know I have a foul mouth, and I DO reign it in here, believe it or not.My definition of porn is nudity and sex without artistic bent. Without a person trying to convey a thought or idea.
My camera died, and Steve was kind enough to order a replacement, it will be here this week. In time for our Family Reunion, we host that. So lots of pics coming up!
Among the pics will be some work we are doing to avoid naked ninja putz neighbor, and improve the value of our property. The work started today, but here in NY we hit 100°, and the humidity made it feel like 104°. The work had to stop, I can't risk peoples health cause of a putz.But it will continue this week, and I'll post pics of that too.
I have missed you more than you missed me. Im sorry that I have to approve all comments but yall know how I feel about that :/ Here's a pic I'd like to share, until I blog again. I top-dressed that gorgeous Christmas cactus I have [i.e, added 2" of soil to the pot,rather than transplant]The next time I rotated it's pot, look what I found...a wax begonia baby. I do not grow begonias, this was a traveler in the potting soil I used. I LOVED this:


Love,
Gail

Plant-TASTIC Thursday !

Plant-tastic Thursday!
I've been promising pics, but I needed to wait until there was something to show you. The garden is up and growing:




Since this is the first growing cycle I will have at the Shack, I kept it simple...tomatoes [big, regular, roma, cherry, and "patio"...I thought I'd grabbed 2 romas, I love them oven roasted], cukes, squash, zucchini, and 2 blueberry bushes that won't produce for years yet, but it's nice to know they're there.

Also, the parsley is a really happy camper:



Parsley, chives, basil, and radishes in the 2 planters. I swear, the herbs grow like weeds, so this keeps them contained.
This is a maranta, and did not flower in the old place, it simply did not have the right conditions. It does now!



And the orchids are still beautiful.




I believe they are coming to the end of their bloom cycle, so we'll see if I kill them or not.

Now this, THIS made my heart sing.When you think of cactus, you think tons of sun, right? WHY would a person who knows she doesn't have the right conditions buy cacti? Because they are cute? I bought this tiny baby cactus in 2000. It never flowered. 2 weeks ago, I walked by it and eyeballed it....it looked like it was covered in deer ticks! I had the planter in my hand, ready to throw it out the door, and then I thought WAIT.....if ticks tried to affix themselves to cacti, they'd be stabbed to death! That can't be ticks, but what is it? THEY ARE MY VERY FIRST CACTI FLOWERBUDS!!!!! I waited til now to blog a pic so I could see the color of the blooms. The buds themselves have almost a wooden outer coating, quite unlike any other flowerbud I've seen. Probably to protect it from the spines of the cacti. I can't tell you how thrilled I am with those flowerbuds! I am a cacti virgin no more!



In one of my gardening orders from a small nursery, I got a "surprize" package of seeds. Aloe seeds. Fresh in 1998 [that is not a typo. 1998.] So I thought, what the hell? I made the attempt to germinate them. And got me a lil baby Aloe, it's planted in a rosin container:



Also, we finally decided what to do about the neighbors. Plant a living wall of evergreen, from the rear of our property, 3/4 of the lot width up to the front yard. I'll post before and afters of that rodeo too, but at least we contracted that out. *I* can't see me lugging 15-20 trees around. And I hope Steve can't see it either, or I'll give him such a talking-to.

I'll be back!

I had a lovely Moms Day! I will blog tomorrow about that, as well as the other stuf going on in Gail land :o)AND....drum roll please...i will post a pic of a CACTUS that is starting to bloom for me. I have owned it for 10+ years, but never had the right conditions for it. I am so excited about that!

This and That

I need
-A 5 minute delay "Are you SURE, Lady?" button on the dishwasher, for when you just hit start, and people bring in more dishes that COULD have gone in there, but now YOU have to wash them. Happens all the time..

-A taser or stun gun, or club, or SOMETHING that I can use on the person who gets behind me in a grocery store line, and starts sighing over the size of my order. Listen, they have quick checks, self-checks, and express lanes. Don't get behind me on a regular lane with a playboy and a big bottle of hand lotion and expect ME to apologize. Putz.

-Something better than my middle finger, to express my dismay at the dismal driving skills of some drivers. Last time I looked Stop" means "STOP", not don't look/don't tell and roll right in front of me. And then proceed to do 20 in a 45. While my grocery order is thawing in the back of the truck. Almost all the time, I can ignore this type of stupidity...considering that the wonderful GPS people haven't gotten around to mapping our re-done area roads yet, you have to be prepared to be cut off at a moments notice, by people THINKING they'd be making a right onto a ramp, and discovering in less than a quarter mile they'll need to make a left at a light. I feel bad for them. But not for the intentional assholes.

......SOMEWHERE, where I can swing something like a bat or a cudgel at something, and a member of the government that made these tax laws gets hurt. You know, like Whack-A-Mole? I don't care which one, just that one of them pays for this utter stupidity. Don't even get me STARTED this year, this should be a HONKIN return for us. Nope.

My cello [you'll note I didn't call her Ruby, when she's a bitch she is just "my cello"] has developed some anti-social tendencies I HATE. I had to replace the bridge, and it has a much higher profile than the one that came with the cello....and the one I ordered is a "low".....so short of finding a way to shave the sucker myself, I am stuck with this bridge. It totally changes the sound of Ruby. I am struggling to play the harmonics, and simply the act of playing is more difficult, as the strings ride higher over the fingerboard than they used to. I also think my A string is possessed, it is biting down into this bridge the same way it bit so badly into the other bridge I had to replace it. Think it's time to ditch that A string too. [I might just rebuild the area under the A string on the old bridge and switch it back, Ruby sounds like she's strangling, and I HATE it.

Now the good stuff.....
I am really happy to say, it looks like Steves sciatica is finally easing up. The poor guy has been attacked by it, night and day, for over 2 months. It's been writing on the slate of who he is.....he is very active at home on the weekends, and hasn't been able to do anything. Yesterday he spent 3 hours outside, and when he came in he looked 10 years younger, I could SEE the sciatica leaving his face. YAY Honey!!

OH YEAH!!! You've seen the commercials for the brownie pan...you pour the batter in, put into the pan what looks like the divider in an old metal ice cube tray, and bake. You're supposed to wind up with beautiful lil separate brownies. I got one to play with. My main application for it would be baking cornbread for the big holiday do's and freezing it ahead of service, I just don't like store bought corn bread as much as home made, and I'm kinda fond of the people who show up, and want them to have the good stuff.

But back to the baking dish. I didn't want to make brownies, so I settled on Angel Food cake squares, I'd already macerated the strawberries for it. The instruction guide said, if you're making cake, to plan on the same amount of batter you'd use in a 13x9 pan....one box. So that's what I did. It looked a bit full, so I saved back enough batter to make 9 angel food cupcakes with. Put it in the oven.
O.M.G.
Think, I Love Lucy and the endless loaf of bread. That sucker puffed up like an Adder in a room full of Meerkats, I just had to laugh. By the end of the baking time, you couldn't see the grid for the cake puffed up all over the place. Pretty damn funny, and I promise the next time I screw up with it, I'll get pics. I was just laughing too hard :o) But it tasted just fine. [if you get one....a half box of cake batter will do just fine.]

I love the lil sucker, and am glad I have it.And even gladder that it's dishwasher safe, I wouldn't buy it if I had to hand scrub all the little nooks and crannies in there.

And this, from my Boo. Thank You Dear, for reminding me how old I am LOL...I got 'em all right :O)
-----
For OLDER people... MEMORY TEST!

This is NOT a pushover test.
There are 20 questions. Average score is 12.
This one will be difficult for the younger set.
Have fun, but no peeking!
Good luck, youngsters.


1. What builds strong bodies 12 ways?
A. Flintstones vitamins
B. The Buttmaster
C. Spaghetti
D. Wonder Bread
E.. Orange Juice
F. Milk
G. Cod Liver Oil

2. Before he was Muhammed Ali, he was...
A. Sugar Ray Robinson
B. Roy Orbison
C. Gene Autry
D. Rudolph Valentino
E. Fabian
F. Mickey Mantle
G. Cassius Clay

3. Pogo, the comic strip character said, 'We have met the enemy and...
A. It's you
B. He is us
C. It's the Grinch
D. He wasn't home
E. He's really me an
F. We quit
G. He surrendered

4. Good night David.
A.. Good night Chet
B. Sleep well
C. Good night Irene
D. Good night Gracie
E. See you later alligator
F. Until tomorrow
G. Good night Steve

5. You'll wonder where the yellow went...
A. When you use Tide
B. When you lose your crayons
C. When you clean your tub
D. If you paint the room blue
E. If you buy a soft water tank
F.. When you use Lady Clairol
G. When you brush your teeth with Pepsodent

6. Before he was the Skipper's Little Buddy, Bob Denver was Dobie's friend...
A. Stuart Whitman
B. Randolph Scott
C. Steve Reeves
D. Maynard G. Krebbs
E. Corky B. Dork
F. Dave the Whale
G. Zippy Zoo

7. Liar, liar...
A. You're a liar
B. Your nose is growing
C. Pants on fire
D. Join the choir
E. Jump up higher
F.. On the wire
G. I'm telling Mom

8. Meanwhile, back in Metropolis, Superman fights a never ending battle for truth, justice and.....
A. Wheaties
B. Lois Lane
C. TV ratings
D. World peace
E. Red tights
F. The American way
G. News headlines

9. Hey kids! What time is it?
A. It's time for Yogi Bear
B It's time to do your homework
C. It's Howdy Doody Time
D. It's Time for Romper Room
E. It's bedtime
F. The Mighty Mouse Hour
G. Scoopy Doo Time

10. Lions and tigers and bears....
A. Yikes!
B. Oh no!
C. Gee whiz!
D. I'm scared!
E. Oh my!
F. Help! Help!
G. Let's run!

11. Bob Dylan advised us never to trust anyone...
A. Over 40
B. Wearing a uniform
C. Carrying a briefcase
D. Over 30
E. You don't know
F. Who says, 'Trust me'
G.. Who eats tofu

12. NFL quarterback who appeared in a television commercial wearing women's stockings... .
A. Troy Aikman
B. Kenny Stabler
C. Joe Namath
D. Roger Staubach
E. Joe Montana
F. Steve Young
G. John Elway


13. Brylcream...
A. Smear it on
B. You'll smell great
C. Tame that cowlick
D. Grease ball heaven
E. It's a dream
F. We're your team
G. A little dab'll do ya

14. I found my thrill...
A. In Blueberry muffins
B.. With my man, Bill
C.. Down at the mill
D. Over the windowsill
E. With thyme and dill
F. Too late to enjoy
G. On Blueberry Hill

15. Before Robin Williams, Peter Pan was played by...
A. Clark Gable
B. Mary Martin
C. Doris Day
D. Errol Flynn
E. Sally Fields
F. Jim Carey
G. Jay Leno

16. Name the Beatles...
A. John, Steve, George, Ringo
B. John, Paul, George, Roscoe
C. John, Paul, Stacey, Ringo
D. Jay, Paul, George, Ringo
E. Lewis, Peter, George, Ringo
F. Jason, Betty, Skipper, Hazel
G. John, Paul, George, Ringo

17. I wonder, wonder, who.
A. Who ate the leftovers?
B. Who did the laundry?
C. Was it you?
D. Who wrote the book of love?
E. Who I am?
F. Passed the test?
G. Knocked on the door?

18. I'm strong to the finish...
A. Cause I eats my broccoli
B. Cause I eats me spinach
C. Cause I lift weights
D. Cause I'm the hero
E. And don't you forget it
F. Cause Olive Oyl loves me
G. To outlast Bruto

19. When it's least expected, you're elected, you're the star today
A. Smile, you're on Candid Camera
B. Smile, you're on Star Search
C. Smile, you won the lottery
D. Smile, we're watching you
E. Smile, the world sees you
F. Smile, you're a hit
G. Smile, you're on TV

20. What do M & M's do?
A. Make your tummy happy
B. Melt in your mouth, not in your pocket
C. Make you fat
D. Melt your heart
E. Make you popular
F. Melt in your mouth, not in your hand
G. Come in colors

Below are the right answers:
1. D - Wonder Bread
2. G - Cassius Clay
3. B - He Is Us
4. A - Good night, Chet
5. G - When you brush your teeth with Pepsodent
6. D - Maynard G. Krebbs
7. C - Pants On Fire
8. F - The American Way
9. C - It's Howdy Doody Time
10. E - Oh My
11. D - Over 30
12. C - Joe Namath
13. G - A little dab'll do ya
14. G - On Blueberry Hill
15. B - Mary Martin
16. G - John, Paul, George, Ringo
17. D - Who wrote the book of Love
18. B - Cause I eats me spinach
19. A - Smile, you're on Candid Camera
20. F - Melt In Your Mouth Not In Your Hand